It's been 2 months and 19 days (there and there about) since I put on my first pair of skates, I'm not claiming to know much of anything about the wonderful world of Roller Derby but this is the world through my eyes. Lets get into it.

GET YO ASS OFF THAT CHAIR!

This is just a short one, I was NSOing at the Great Yorkshire Showdown last month and I just wanted to put a heads up to any girls in the Sin Bin. When the NSO tells you to stand you CAN’T hover over the seat, you must STAND otherwise you’ll get sent right back into the Sin Bin once you leave the box, (or at least that’s what happened at this particular bout!) just take note that if your a jammer your Zebra Boy WILL be watching you. Also, I know that your heads in the game and it’s easy to get confused when an NSO says stand to think “OFF I GO!” I skate off, while your in the Sin Bin please, please, please listen carefully other wise you will be sent back to do another minuet. Finally, remember to keep your mouth guards in and equipment on at all times when your in the Sin Bin, you can only take them off if your readjusting your pads, ect. These are all simple things that could get you sent right back into the Sin Bin, I know your probably all shouting at your screens saying “WE KNOW THIS ALREADY!” but when your heads in the game it’s easy to forget!

P.S as well all know I’m hardly even three months into my Reff training, so if you think I have something wrong PLEASE message me so I’m not sending the wrong info out there! Thanks a-lot!

G-Rods, I’ve been rolling around on them for about a month now and I can’t recommend them enough. For the most part the G-Rods have good grip and stability, I practice on two different types of sports courts the first being a very slippy wooden court, the G-rods on the whole work out pretty well though depending on who dusty the court is I do find my self sliding just a little but even a slipping little can put you off. The second sports court has a lot more grip, I’m not sure what type of flooring it is because I’m a vapid like that but the difference is astounding, I don’t think I’ve found myself slipping once while rolling around on the second floor. The first time I put on these wheels I can remember how smooth it felt rolling around on them, this was a huge difference to my previous wheels that just came with the skates (okay so I have no clue what they where called but they where rubbish, I do use them to skate in the park though but mainly because I don’t care if they get wrecked) which in comparison just felt…slow I guess the word would be. The only drawback for me is how slippy they seem to be on the wooden surfaces, now I don’t know if that’s due to the slippyness (not a word I know but if Nigella Lawson can make words up so can I!) of the dusty wood or the grip on the wheels, though even then they perform perfectly which is really what you want if spend nearly £100 on wheels. As soon as I get the funds I’m totally going to be checking out these: I’ve heard some really awesome things bout Poisons and, as soon as I have the funds imma get me a set!

G-Rods, I’ve been rolling around on them for about a month now and I can’t recommend them enough. For the most part the G-Rods have good grip and stability, I practice on two different types of sports courts the first being a very slippy wooden court, the G-rods on the whole work out pretty well though depending on who dusty the court is I do find my self sliding just a little but even a slipping little can put you off. The second sports court has a lot more grip, I’m not sure what type of flooring it is because I’m a vapid like that but the difference is astounding, I don’t think I’ve found myself slipping once while rolling around on the second floor.

The first time I put on these wheels I can remember how smooth it felt rolling around on them, this was a huge difference to my previous wheels that just came with the skates (okay so I have no clue what they where called but they where rubbish, I do use them to skate in the park though but mainly because I don’t care if they get wrecked) which in comparison just felt…slow I guess the word would be.

The only drawback for me is how slippy they seem to be on the wooden surfaces, now I don’t know if that’s due to the slippyness (not a word I know but if Nigella Lawson can make words up so can I!) of the dusty wood or the grip on the wheels, though even then they perform perfectly which is really what you want if spend nearly £100 on wheels.

As soon as I get the funds I’m totally going to be checking out these:

Atom, Poison

I’ve heard some really awesome things bout Poisons and, as soon as I have the funds imma get me a set!

If this was twitter I’d totally #mmrlove this!

INTROLLER DERBY

I guess I’ve tried to blog before and, it’s never really worked out…but personally I think its because I haven’t found the one thing I’m passionate about now, however I think I have. Let me start of by saying I’m not the sportiest person in the word, I’ve never supported a football team, the same goes for rugby or really any team biased sport; so as you can maybe guess I’m not the fittest person in the world either! So i’m pretty lucky I’ve found a sport that works for me and, Roller Derby isn’t really for the faint hearten!

How did I find Derby? In ever fat kids wet dream, Ace of cakes (need I say anymore? Even thinking about it is putting into a diabetic coma…and I’m not even Diabetic!) in late August and, they’d fashioned this amazing cake in the shape of a skate for a roller derby skate and, what can I say. The mixture of cake and fast paced carnage must have peeked an interest, and it had nothing to do about the girls skating around sparkly pants…no, really I’m 100% homoawesome so it was probably partly dude to the sparkly pants. Anyway, at this point I wasn’t even sure if there even was a roller derby team in the town I live so I did the next best thing, I know we have this great thing called the interwebs but it didn’t occur to me at the time to look, I bought Whip It and watched it way to much.

I’m aware as a guy I don’t have vagina and couldn’t actually PLAY Roller Derby but I was hooked, so later that week I got searching on the net and apparently, we had a Roller Derby league in the UK and even better…there was team close to me. I instantly emailed them figuring it was worth a shot to ask if I could help out. At this point I should probably tell you I’m one of the most socially awkward person in the world, I’m the kind of guy that’ll say one or two sentences to you and walk away out of sheer panicked awkwardness; so for me to do anything like this, yes it was only and email but I was panicked out my mind, it was a big deal. As it turns out they could train me up to become a Zebra Boy, that’s a referee in standard sporting terms but there’s really nothing standard about Roller Derby.

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